Thursday, October 16, 2008

In Loving Memory


My sweet father passed peacefully away last night, October 15, 2008. I find great comfort in knowing he is free from his suffering. I know he is happy and well. I just don't know exactly how to live without him. I'm sure it is a process and an adjustment that I will probably struggle with for the rest of my life.
"When you come to the edge of all that you've known and are about to step into darkness, one of two things will happen. Either there will be something solid for you to stand on, or you will be taught to fly."
While I cannot begin to fathom how to live with the void of my father's absence. I am comforted in the knowledge that he gave me both wings to fly and a solid foundation to stand on. Two very valueable gifts that will see me through.
But oh, how I will miss him.

8 comments:

whitney said...

I cannot begin to understand what you are going through. You are always in our prayers! Love you so very much!

Natalie said...

I am so sad for you, but happy for him. He will take good care of your baby for the next few months! You are in my thoughts and prayers!

kerri said...

Jill,
When my mom was killed in a car accident 7 years ago, I had a very close friend whose mother had passed away as a result of cancer when she was a young girl. That terrible night that call came for me... my sister called, following the visit she recieved from her bishop and the local police... it left me feeling desperate to call my friend Sue... I needed to know... to know "how did she live without a mom?" I was quite certain all of the people who assured me "it gets easier" simply DID NOT love their mothers as much as I loved mine. I remember thinking how, now after this... I would know exactly what to say and do for somebody who had suffered the loss of a loved one, a parent... I don't... my heart is aching for you! Comforted by the thought he is happy and well again as you mentioned... so sad for your loss. I was incredibly touched reading your posts about your father, you write beautifully. May you find comfort in the knowledge that he is not far away... you will see him in everything! And on that very special day in April... You will know as you look into that newborn baby's eyes... he or she will already know and love you... they will have been told all about you.
Please know that our thoughts and prayers are with you and your sweet family.
All our love,
The Schaefer family (Kerri)

Chelle said...

Jill, I do believe there is power in knowing there are others who mourn with you, who send heart felt love and prayers on your behalf. Please know that I am sincerely sending loving thoughts and prayers heavenward on your behalf -- mourning with you about your father and rejoicing in the miracle of new life for your family. love you.

Shelley said...

Jill-
I am so very sorry for your loss. My dad died just over 4 years ago from a slow-moving cancer that took him by bits. By the time he went we were thankful to see him released, and it was a while before I could cry for him. Maybe the best thing I can tell you is that while the loss is still there, sometimes sharper than ever, the memories get sweeter. I see him now in his prime, instead of suffering in his old age. I remember the twinkle in his eye, and his ever-ready wisdom. That's the part that never leaves, and even gets better with time. May you too be comforted by such sweet memories. Love, Shelley

Melissa said...

Jill I am so sorry for your loss but glad to know your dad is no longer suffering. My thoughts are with you. Much love to you and your family at this difficult time.

Michelle said...

Jill- I am so sorry. I am a friend of Chelle and Brooke and they have introduced me to your beautiful writing and thoughtful life. Bless you.

Laurel said...

I am so behind in my blog reading and I hate that I'm just reading this...Loss is always hard...especially for a girl & her daddy.
"He gave me both wings to fly and a solid foundation to stand on." BEAUTIFUL...what a tribute!
I hope the holidays are filled with peace and family and love.
(and sweet congratulations on the pregnancy!)
xoxo